life in the NICU

you know you are a NICU mom when....

* Your NICU kid is now 14, and you're still talking about his or her "Adjusted Age".

* You're addicted to acronyms. *NICU, CPAAP, RSV, IVH, A's and B's…*

* You get all weepy when you see a normal, picture perfect delivery on TV.

* You refer to NICU procedures with the skill of a NICU nurse.

* You get a little sad when you pass a hospital.

* You just can't truly enjoy yourself no matter what you're doing because your heart is still in the NICU.

* You can't help but tell your NICU story.

* You realize it's possible to get LESS sleep than moms of full term babies because of all the late night worrying.

* You see a picture of a baby with the NICU elephant nose and go, "Awwww!!"

* You actually have to buy doll clothes just so your NICU baby will have clothes that fit!

* You have a special box of NICU souvenirs you keep meaning to scrapbook.

* You know the name of every baby in the NICU & who their nurse is for that day.

* The different personalities of the nurses at the NICU no longer get under your skin...you've learned how to react to each one accordingly.

* You get sentimental & worried when you hear beeping sounds.

* You could check your NICU baby's vital signs faster than any health care professional you've met so far.

* You keep hand sanitizer in every room of your house & you ask people to use it before coming near your NICU baby.

* You still scrub your hands like a surgeon.

* Your only concern every day is when it's time for the "hands on" session with your baby, & you turn into Godzilla when you find out that your baby's hands on procedures were completed before you got there.

* You're an expert on calming your parents down because the NICU has a crazy strict visitation policy regarding their own grandbaby. 

* You know that "kangaroo care" isn't a kid's game, in fact-it's your most FAVORITE time of the day, the reason you get out of bed…

* You no longer need an alarm clock to wake you up at midnight every night-that's when you call to check on your NICU baby's weight!

* To everyone else, an ounce is just a measurement, but to you an ounce is more valuable than gold-you praise God for every one your NICU baby gains.

* Your heart skips a beat when the nurse puts you on hold before telling you your baby's daily report because you fear that may mean bad news.

* Your NICU baby is over a year old & you still feel like you need to ask someone before you hold her.

* The March of Dimes becomes the most important fund raiser to you.

* You know what Micro-Preemie means & you thank God every day that your NICU baby wasn't one; being a mother to a regular preemie is hard enough.

* Your NICU baby's home coming is THE happiest day of your life *so far*

*The hospital smell that most people hate brings tears to your eyes because it reminds you of your NICU experience.

* You bring your NICU baby home from the hospital with a new found appreciation for her doctors & nurses…God used them to save your baby's life.

waiting

Thankful to have a sister who gets it and sends me encouragement like this.....Love you sister!

Waiting by Linda Dillow 

Desparately, helplessly, longingly I cried
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate.
And the Master so gently said, "Child you must wait!"

"Wait? You say, wait!" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers. I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heart?
By faith I have asked, and am claiming your Word."

"My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a yes, a go-ahead sign,
Or even a no to which I can resign."

"And Lord, you promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry,
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, "So I'm waiting ....for what?"

He seemed then to kneel and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.

All you seek, I could give and pleased you would be
You would have what you want,
but you wouldn't know Me.

You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.

You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair.
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.

You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of my Spirit descends like a dove.
You'd know that I give and I save...(for a start).
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of my heart.

The glow of my comfort late into the night
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God who makes what you have last.

You'd never know should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for thee.'
Yes, your dreams for your loved ones overnight would come true,
But, oh the loss! If I lost what I'm doing in you!

So be silent, my child and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to get to know me
And though oft may my answers seem terribly late.
My wisest of answers is still but to wait."

a good word

thankful for how God's word always satisfies and shows up right on time. Basking in the wisdom of God from Romans 11. 

Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God!

How unsearchable his judgments,

And his paths beyond tracing out!

Who has known the mind of The Lord?

Or who has been His counselor?

Who has ever given to God, 

That God should repay him?

For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. 

To Him be the glory forever! Amen. 

opening another door.....

for the past few months, we have been desperately searching God's will to determine His plan for how to grow our family.....since we made the change from Haiti's international program to a domestic program last june....ray godwin's office has come across our paths multiple times - we made contact with them last june to inquire about their domestic program to compare to bethany's, mr. godwin's legal assistant actually contacted us in january about a potential placement, we called and talked to them again this february about their domestic program and several friends and family mentioned to us about his practice. we met with him last friday and officially retained him as our adoption attorney today.

we are excited about this new door opening and are leaving the door open with bethany as well. may God's will be done and may our hearts willingly follow where He leads....

obedience

the path to obedience is not always the path without difficulty or suffering........

choosing to cling this week to the freedom of submission, surrender, and self denial instead of clinging, grasping, and fretting.....

Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand.

on waiting....

waiting - to patiently anticipate

psalm 27:14
wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage;  wait for the LORD!

psalm 37:34
wait for the LORD and keep his way and he will exalt you to inherit the land...

psalm 40: 1-3
i waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. he put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the LORD.

psalm 62:5
for God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.

isaiah 25:9
it will be said on that day, "behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, that he might save us. This is the LORD; we have waited for him; let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation."

isaiah 40:31
but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

lamentations 3:26
it is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.

daniel 12:12

blessed is he who waits and arrives at the 1,335 days.

habakkuk 2:3
for still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end - it will not lie. If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay.

acts 1:4
and while staying with them he ordered them not to depart from Jerusalem, but to wait for the promise of the Father, which, he said, "you heard from me..."

1 corinthians 1:4-9
i give thanks to my God always for you because of the grace of God that was given you in Christ Jesus, that in every way you were enriched in him in all speech and all knowledge - even as the testimony about Christ was confirmed among you - so that you are not lacking in any spiritual gift, as you wait for the revealing of our Lord Jesus Christ, who will sustain you to the end, guiltless in the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is faithful, by whom you were called into the fellowship of his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.

hope

Romans 4:18 - 5:5

Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, "So shall your offspring be." Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead - since he was about a hundred years old - and that Sarah's womb was also dead. Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. That is why "it was credited to him as righteousness." The words "it was credited to him" were written not for him alone, but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness - for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead. He was delivered over to death for our sins and raised to life for our justification.

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.


His Word is life. Thank you Lord for your unending love and hope poured out to us through your Word. It sustains and guides. We are so thankful.